What is the difference?
I have heard, “It’s just a cute way of saying that someone else is masturbating you”, and you’d be forgiven to think so considering all the various videos and written material out there.
As an Intimacy Wellness therapist and educator, I would like to show you a different way, a way that brings wholeness, healing, and flourishing.
As there are so many wonderful men reading on this site, I would like to address this post to you and how to make your lady really feel nourished and opened up in a new way.
It all boils down to intention, being fully present with meditative consciousness.
You have there in front of you a divine being.
Now, she may not feel divine, in her mind she may not look divine, but you have the power to consciously activate the loving masculine in you in order to release the radiant feminine divine in her.
Want to know how?
First of all, this is not sex. Nothing wrong with great sex! It’s delicious and wonderful … but here we are talking about a meditative practice that could just exponentially enhance your lovemaking … and her desiring more of it!
For this practice, you want to sloooooow down, actually you need to become even slower.
But first of all, she needs to not only feel comfortable and relaxed, but also feel safe.
The feminine is like a wild river when unleashed and will become even more powerful when the masculine offers her some river banks. This not to restrain her or dominate her, it is for her to feel safe, knowing she can lean on the masculine and that she does not need to feel that she needs to be in control and feel responsible for everything … including your pleasure and comfort.
The vigilance centre in a woman’s brain is by far more active than in a man. She is constantly on the lookout to give something her attention, to be on the alert, to make sure everything is ok. By giving her a precise container she can trust, she will be able to quiet her vigilance centre.
If she knows, that what you are doing is not foreplay, not leading to sex, she can trust that you’re not jumping on her … this is purely just her time to feel nurtured and divine … she will gradually open up, one petal at the time.
You see, we can have wild passionate sex, and our hearts can be closed and clothed whilst being naked, as we may not feel safe enough to open up our unconscious vulnerability.
It is precisely that unconscious vulnerability of the opened blossom that releases the irresistible fragrance and aroma of the feminine .. the very essence that your deepest masculinity yearns for … the relinquishing of all our control, just melting in your arms, safely yielding to your love.
You goddess needs to feel your unwavering presence and how you consciously holds her in an orgasmic state of opening. During that process she might express her joy, bliss or past pain, sometimes all muddled up, and could be very confusing to you. Please don’t react to that, just lovingly hold the space for her with rock solid love and masculinity.
Penetrate your goddess with your masculine consciousness, not your penis.
Let go of your ego of what you can achieve for her, and just be there in a worshipful and meditative way.
Remember, this is not the time for hot sexiness, but honouring and adoring the divine feminine in her.
As you set this frame and safeport her with these intentions .. we can now begin …
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